It’s still hard to believe it’s already been one month since the birth of my baby girl. Most of my friends told me I’d miss being pregnant, but to be honest I haven’t looked back much. Other than feeling her from the inside and the anticipation of her arrival; I’m very happily consumed with my daughter to care too much about missing my pregnancy. She truly is the greatest gift I’ve ever been given which makes me focus more on the present and future than looking back.
For the most part, adjusting to motherhood has been the most natural and easy thing for me; however, I cannot deny it comes with its challenges. Taking care of her and loving her to pieces is easy as pie. Changing diapers, consoling cries, feeding her, bathing her… they’re all the joys and wonders of being a mommy. So far she has been a really good baby. We’ve had a couple fussy nights, but for the most part she only wakes me up once to be fed and changed. She’s living the good life… eat, sleep, poop, repeat!
So what are the challenges I’ve faced so far? First and foremost I worry about her health. For example, I didn’t realize that it’s very common for infants to have nasal congestion in the first few weeks. So two weeks into motherhood I was wondering why my baby was already sick. I lost a night of sleep listening to her congested breathing worrying there was something terribly wrong. Being the paranoid person and now mommy that I am; I was on the phone with her pediatrician first thing the next morning. Of course they asked to see her only to tell me she’s great. Amazing how I’ve gone from worrying about me every day to this little life that depends on me 24/7. It made me realize I’ll never rest easy again and that I’ll forever be worried about her health and well being. She’s already making me stronger so perhaps she’ll break me out of the paranoid shell I’ve been living in for 32 years.
My second challenge is breast feeding her in public. I find myself stressing out every time we leave the house wondering and worrying when the next time she’s going to need to eat. I have nursing shirts, bras, big shawls and a cover up yet I still fear that I’ll accidentally flash my tatas for all to see. Before she was even a week old we were out and I ended up feeding her in a family bathroom at a department store and in the car with both of us completely covered under a blanket. While I’m not shy and don’t have much shame, breast feeding is something I think of as very private. So I’ve discovered that I’m simply not one of those mommies that is comfortable letting it all hang out in public.
My list of worries might not be long, but I’m sure each new stage will bring new concerns and challenges. For now I’m just basking in my new mommy glow, and going with the flow learning as we go!