By now, if you’re one of my many followers, then you are well aware how much I love taking and sharing pictures and photography. I love the “Photo A Day” challenges, so much so that it inspired me back in February to write a blog a day. I’ve found so many challenges online and in December I did two different photo challenges, but I always tend to play the Fat Mum Slim photo challenge the most. One of the reasons I like the challenge is because most of the time I try to tap into my creative side and step outside what a typical post would be. I also love using #hashtags so I can see what some of the creative pictures other people post and come up with as well.
Today I’m working from home and while eating my boring lunch of soup and crackers, I looked at my photo a day calendar to see that today’s challenge (day 21) is “I care about this…” I literally thought to myself, “Well shit! I care about a million and one things! How on earth am I ever going to narrow this down to just one thing?!” So I really thought about it for a few minutes. What do I care about that I truly feel like is an essential part of my everyday and every week life? I simply couldn’t narrow it down to just one thing so I did a “fabfour” picture collage choosing four things that I care about and took pictures of them. I decided to write a blog in honor of today’s photo challenge and explain why chose the following. Brace yourself readers, this one is a bit lengthy! 😉
Music and singing are both things that are very near and dear to my heart. I’ve said the cliche saying a million times before, that music saves my soul on a daily basis. There was a time in my life when all I thought about was music, singing and writing songs. I started singing as a very small child and my first real memory of singing I was about five years old. I was at my grandmothers house in Cape Cod and it was Christmas time (my absolute favorite time of the year). I started singing “Silent Night” just playing around the house. My grandmother was downstairs changing laundry and when she came upstairs she said to me, “Susie, what are you listening to? It’s beautiful!” I told her I wasn’t listening to anything and that I was just singing. I remember she was shocked and amazed. After that I sang around the house all the time. I literally used to stand on the edge of my bathtub with a brush in my hand pretending it was my microphone starring at myself in the mirror (how vain!) for hours. My brother would be pounding on the door fighting for my stage (the bathroom). When I was in eighth grade my dad took me into Boston one day and brought me to Berklee College of Music. We walked around the college and he showed me around the city and different parts of the campus. From then on I told my parents the only college I was interested in was Berklee. I started taking professional private voice lessons when I was a freshman in high school at 14 years old. I joined the chorus and ensembles at school, did the musicals and pretty much participated and anything music related that I could. My senior year I looked into and visited two colleges and only applied to one. That one was Berklee and that’s where I got accepted, attended and graduated from in 2003 with a degree in songwriting. Admittedly, as I’ve gotten older, wiser, matured and grown as an individual, my wants in life have dramatically changed. I used to want more than anything to be on broadway or become the next Sarah McLachlan. Now, I still care about music, but fame and fortune are far from what I’m looking for or what I dream about at night. While music and singing will always be be an important piece of who I am, (I have a singing gig in less than two weeks), it no longer defines me. The power it has still saves me and move me, but it no longer consumes or defines me.
The next picture in my collage is my road bike and some weights. Exercise, working out, staying fit and being healthy was never something that I thought or cared about as a kid and growing up. It never occurred to me that drinking soda would make me fat or that being active could be fun. While attending Berklee I did a lot of walking, and I mean a lot! I walked around the city five days a week. I never thought about it as exercise, but none the less, within my first semester I dropped 10lbs. I was amazed! I had also cut out sugary drinks like soda and cut back on eating at places like McDonald’s. Now, it’s literally been just shy of 10 years since I’ve stepped foot into a fast food restaurant and ordered something to eat. Once I started seeing results without even thinking I was trying or doing anything I became very interested in learning more about being fit and healthy. A lot of what I’ve learned has been by trial and error. I joined a gym and started working out and taking fitness classes. Spin and kickboxing classes were my favorite. In high school I couldn’t even make it around a track once without seeing stars, literally! Once I got my fitness level up I started running and have now completed three half marathons. I love running, hiking, cycling, yoga and working out. If you’ve read any of my recent posts you know I am no longer a big fan of a “regular gym.” Pretty much the only weights you’ll see me lifting are the ones in my little picture, dumbbells. Sorry for any fitness guru’s, but I simply do not like the machines at a gym. Give me a mountain, give me pavement, give me something I can hold in my hands, but please do not stick me on a machine. Since getting into fitness I’ve taken a nutrition class, worked with personal trainers (the first one being in college) and done a lot of research. I’ve learned that I don’t like or want to workout to be “skinny” or fit. I want to eat to be healthy and so I can workout. My once 150lb body now ranges from 119-123 depending on the day. I try not to weigh myself daily because that’s silly, but I do usually weigh myself about once a week. And if I see it on the higher end of 123 I try not to get upset and take into consideration the time of month, what I ate the day before and how I’m feeling. Bottom line, if my clothes fit and I feel good then I’m doing something right. I simply enjoy working out, getting my sweat on and being healthy and that’s really all that matters! It’s become a huge part of how I am, what I love and what I care about.
Next in my collage is a collection of journals that I’ve written in and kept over the years. Some of these literally go back to high school. Ever since I was a little girl I loved to write. I wrote poetry and stories all the time and really felt like it was one of the strongest ways I could communicate with myself and others. My aunt is also a writer, she’s incredible actually, and her and I used to write poems and call each other to read them and get an opinion. A lot of these journals are from her. Whenever I had a birthday or Christmas came around she almost always gave me a new journal. I’ve kept diaries and journals throughout my life. Some are simply thoughts scattered on a piece of paper while others are long winded stories. Like most artists and writers, I tend to get the best out of myself when I’m somber and upset. During my parents divorce I wrote a lot. It wasn’t until college that it occurred to me that I should write songs. One of my professors said well you sing and you write, why not put those two things together? Brilliant! I don’t write songs so much anymore; admittedly that piece of me is a difficult and dark place to tap into. It literally exhausts my emotions to pull song lyrics out of me that I feel are worthy enough. But I still love to write and do so almost every single day. Whether it be here on my blog, for work or somewhere on paper that I only share with myself, writing is something that has always been a big part of me. I’m a writer at heart and it’s something I truly care about.
Last, but definitely not least is a picture of my husband and I on our wedding day. This is actually one of my favorite pictures of us from our day. My husband and I decided to do all our portraits before our wedding ceremony. We wanted to be able to enjoy every second of our day and party with our guests including our cocktail hour and the last thing we wanted to do was to make everyone wait to eat dinner and have fun while we were off taking pictures. We did what was called a “first look” which was an incredibly special and private moment between us seeing each other for the first time all dressed up as bride and groom. After that we did pictures with our families and wedding party. I was really nervous for our ceremony and doing a first look and our pictures ahead of time was a great way to break the ice. I’ve stepped foot onto many stages and sang in front of hundreds of people, but I was still nervous about the ceremony. This was a great way to break the ice because by the time it was time to walk down the aisle I was feeling calm, excited and nothing short of overjoyed. We got so many compliments on our personal wedding vows from our guests and even the wedding coordinator who told me that he was choked up and that they were the most beautiful vows he had ever heard. After hearing the raves I thought to myself, “Why did I get myself so nervous?!” It really couldn’t have gone anymore perfectly or beautifully. The picture I chose was taken after our portraits, but before our ceremony and was a total candid. We weren’t posing or kissing for the photographer and we had no idea it was even taken. After we took a ton of pics with the family and wedding party I told Damon I needed to sit down and take it all in. This was our wedding day! I had been waiting for this day for so long! I knew right away when I met him that he was the man I’d be walking down the aisle to. I never once doubted it and I simply couldn’t wait for it. We sat together, just us, holding hands looking out at the rain and the colorful fall vineyard taking it all in, this was our wedding day. No one else mattered except for us and we didn’t care if it was raining, if no one showed up, or if the power went out. All we needed was each other. Although we’ve been together for almost four and a half years, our wedding day symbolized a new beginning and chapter into our lives and relationship together. So above all things in my life, my husband and our marriage is the one thing that I care about the most. He is still the best part of my everyday and I love more than ever coming home to him and our new house every night. I’ve never met anyone who has the ability to inspire me, motivate me, love me and most of all take me for exactly who I am that way he does every single day. We tell each other every single day that we love each other and that we’re each others best friend, and we truly are best friends. I tell him absolutely everything and he is the person I trust, rely on, love and care about the most in this world.
So, now that I’ve gotten all personal and mushy on you all I’m off to go rest my writing brain. Happy Tuesdays lovahs, readers and bloggers 🙂
~Sparke